


Wish We Had Our Time

by Lyri46



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Family, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:35:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22320412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyri46/pseuds/Lyri46
Summary: Stephen Strange has been acting strangely since Tony's funeral and Wong wants to know what's wrong. What he didn't expect is for Stephen to be mourning a future that could have been. When he looked into the future on Titan there were two possibilities: one where Tony died, and one where Tony lived. But there was nothing Stephen could do to influence which future was to take place.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Stephen Strange, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Stephen Strange & Wong, Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Comments: 19
Kudos: 69





	Wish We Had Our Time

‘I am not taking this anymore, Stephen,’ Wong snaps as he storms into the Sanctum’s library, ‘you need to either tell me why you are moping, or just stop if you don’t want to tell me.’

Stephen sighs and lowers the book he is reading, looking over the top of the pages at his friend. ‘Believe me, Wong, you don’t want to know the reason for my sombre mood; I do however apologise for the effect it is obviously having on my ability to perform my duties and I shall endeavour to do better in the future.’

Wong studies him, face impassive. ‘Stephen I’m not saying this because you are not performing your duties. I am saying this because I am worried for you my friend.’ He takes a seat opposite Stephen and continues to watch him. ‘You have been this way since Stark’s funeral. Are you feeling guilty for what happened? He chose to use the infinity stones and to save us. That was not your doing.’

Stephen looks away and tries to remove the lump that has formed in his throat. ‘I told him there was only one chance but that wasn’t entirely true. It is the second possibility that I am mourning for, Wong.’

‘Why did you only tell them there was one chance to stop Thanos?’

‘Because by the time I came back the chance for the other ending was already gone,’ he sighs, at a firm and gentle coaxing from the Cloak he adds, ‘Tony had two choices when he returned to Earth with Nebula after Titan. If he had chosen to continue in his pursuit of a family with Pepper Potts we had the ending that we have lived through. If he had chosen to focus his energy on finding a solution to the problem of the Infinity Stones and had continued working with the remains of his team? He would have found a way to harness the power of the stones and he would have survived.’

Wong is quiet for a long time. ‘Why did you not tell him this? You could have told him to focus on finding a way to harness their power and then he could have had his family afterwards.’

He shakes his head. ‘You don’t understand, Wong. If he turned his back on Miss Potts then she would never have taken him back again, and the person he would have ended up with would not have been able to give him children.’

‘And you think having children was more important to him than living?’ Wong demands. ‘Don’t you think he deserved to make that choice for himself?’

‘He did,’ Stephen shrugs. ‘He chose Miss Potts and he chose a family. I did not want to change his decision by giving him knowledge of the future. That would not have been fair.’

‘So who would he have ended up with? Not the Black Widow I take it?’ Wong asks, tone curious.

Stephen looks down into his mug of tea. ‘No.’

‘Are you going to make me guess?’

‘No,’ he repeats. Then he finds the courage to look into this friend’s eyes. ‘It was me.’

Wong’s eyes go comically wide and almost bug out of his head. ‘You?’

Stephen nods. ‘And the issue with as good as memory as mine? I can remember every single moment we had together. I couldn’t help it, I watched that time through to the end and I saw our relationship build. I saw its small beginnings, I saw us going on dates, fighting enemies together, recovering together, making sure each other was fully healed. I saw helping Peter together, me teaching him magic and him becoming even stronger than he could be now. I saw us getting engaged, I watched our marriage; and I saw me sitting with him on his death bed, kissing him goodbye one last time. His legacy was a team of young Avengers led by Spider-Man, Peter taking on Stark Industries, and leaving a comprehensive inter-dimensional and inter-galactic defensive line for this world.’

Wong is still watching him silently, impassively as he blinks away tears.

‘It took me a minute at most to watch forty years of our life together, Wong. And in that minute I fell in love with the man I then had to send to either choose that life with me, or to have his family and go to his death, and I couldn’t tell him what I’d seen. I couldn’t tell him I loved him.’

Wong simply blinks and pours them some more tea, handing Stephen his now refilled mug. ‘How did you two start your relationship?’ he asks. Stephen looks at him for a few moments and then, when he realises he’s expecting a truthful answer, he opens his mouth.

* * *

‘Stephen!’ Tony shouts, leaving the battered suit at the doors of the Sanctum. ‘Stephen? Are you alright? Where are you?’

Stephen limps down the stairs, having only just returned from the fight. He feels drained physically and magically, but he knows better than to ignore Tony Stark. ‘I’m fine, Tony, I only took a couple of hits. I came back here to recover as I was more tired from the use of magic than I was injured from any of the attacks. How is the clear up going? Have the press been handled?’

Tony waves off his questions. ‘It’s fine. Carol’s handling the clean-up and Fury’s dealing with the press. I’ve been put in charge of making sure everyone’s alright and one idiotic sorcerer decided to walk off without telling anyone.’

‘I’m _fine_ ,’ Stephen insists, rolling his eyes but unable to stop the butterflies in his stomach at the thought of Tony being so concerned for his welfare. ‘Are _you_ alright?’

‘I have metal protecting me. I’m fine,’ the inventor snaps, and Stephen can’t help but raise an eyebrow as he takes in the several small cuts littering his face and the lines of exhaustion on his forehead. He comes to stand in front of Stephen and turns intensely worried brown eyes onto him. He reaches up with a hand to brush his fingers along Stephen’s cheek. ‘Please don’t go off without telling us again. You really had me worried, Dumbledore, I didn’t know if we should be searching the rubble for you.’

‘I’m-I’m sorry for any worry I caused,’ he manages to get past suddenly dry lips.

Tony studies him carefully for a couple of seconds, before darting forwards and capturing his lips with his own. Stephen, for his part, is so taken aback it takes him a couple of moments to return the kiss. At first it’s tentative and soft, neither sure if the other is about to break away and laugh it off; but as Stephen brings a shaking hand up to the side of Tony’s face, and runs his fingers through the man’s hair, Tony deepens the kiss. He pulls on the front of his robes and pulls him closer, one hand going to the back of his head to keep him in place.

When they finally pull apart they’re breathing heavily. ‘Don’t _ever_ worry me like that again, Stephen. I’m not sure my heart can take it.’

‘I don’t know. If you kiss me like that every time I worry you I might be tempted to do it more often,’ he smirks.

‘How about I show you how I’ll kiss you when you _don’t_ worry me and you can decide which is better?’ Tony returns with a smirk of his own and a raised eyebrow.

‘I think that is a sensible suggestion,’ he replies, and pulls the other man into another kiss.

* * *

‘Did you stay here or did you move into Tony’s home?’ Wong asks.

‘We moved between the two,’ he answers, ‘it was only a couple of months later we started. I established a permanent link between here and our other home so it was easier to go between the two. It was incredibly helpful during some of the battles we faced, and the Avengers helped Kamar-Taj repel an assault by Mordo and his followers.’

They’re silent again for a little time until Wong asks another question. ‘You said you taught Peter how to use magic?’

Stephen’s smile is large this time. ‘He’s an incredibly able student. He picked things up almost as quickly as I did.’

* * *

‘I think I’ve got it!’ Peter shouts excitedly as the orange light takes form in front of him. ‘I’ve got it!’

‘Well done, Pete,’ Tony says from where he’s relaxing on the sofa watching the two of them while he does some work on a tablet. ‘You’re a natural at this. What do you say, Doc?’

‘I say he’s picking it up much quicker than I did at first,’ Stephen smiles at their young protégé. ‘You must have an incredibly open mind Peter.’

‘Na,’ the teenager shakes his head, ‘I’ve just got a great teacher,’ he grins at Stephen. ‘What’s next?’

Tony laughs. ‘We’ve created a monster! You’ll never sleep until he’s learnt everything now.’

‘I think we’ll survive,’ Stephen replies, clapping a hand onto Peter’s shoulder.

Over the next few months Peter masters everything Stephen teaches him very quickly, his eagerness to please coupled with his open and inquisitive mind makes him a wonderful student and Stephen finds himself enjoying teaching in a way he never had before. One night when he and Tony are curled up watching the news he realises just how good a student Peter has been.

‘And now breaking news,’ the anchor says, ‘Spider-Man is currently in downtown Manhatten taking on an enemy that, from reports, has been shooting toxic acid from its mouth that is dissolving everything it hits. Not even his notoriously strong webs are able to withstand its toxicity and police are preparing to call in the other Avengers.’

Tony leaps to his feet and is calling the suit into place, Stephen next to him and calling the Cloak when the next information makes them pause.

‘Wait! Reports coming in. We’re going live with our man on the scene. Henry what’s the latest?’ the anchor says.

‘Thanks, Mary,’ the young reporter says, ‘I’m going to get the camera to show you the fight. Spider-Man appears to have been having lessons from Doctor Strange! He’s abandoned his webs and is using the same weapons as the Sorcerer Supreme.’

The images that fill the television show Peter, Iron Spider suit in place, defending himself from the acid with a magical shield and a magical rope attached to one of the creature’s hands. It looks like a cross between an alligator and a tiger with a scorpion tail.

‘What the hell is that?’ Tony asks.

‘No idea,’ he replies. As they continue to watch Peter dances around the creature, his magical rope doing the same job as his webs in trussing it up; he finishes by flipping over the creature and placing a seal on its mouth to stop any more acid from coming out.

‘He’s done it! Spider-Man has defeated the creature!’ the new reporter says.

‘Shall we go help him clean up?’ Stephen laughs. ‘He obviously doesn’t need our help to handle fights anymore.’

‘Maybe we should bring the retirement plan forwards,’ Tony agrees as Stephen prepares a portal.

* * *

‘That was the first time he used his magical abilities,’ Stephen tells Wong, ‘he just kept getting stronger and stronger. And yet he still remained the humble boy you know today.’

‘I have no idea how if he was around you two egotists so much,’ Wong rolls his eyes. ‘Why have you not started teaching him if he’s that good? He could be an asset to Kamar-Taj _and_ the Avengers if you made him that powerful.’

Stephen looks down and pours the last of the tea from the pot into their mugs before responding. ‘If I tried to offer to teach him now he wouldn’t take it,’ he answers. ‘He’ll blame me, maybe not consciously, for Tony’s death. He won’t take anything from me now.’

‘You didn’t just lose Tony you lost Peter as well,’ Wong nods. ‘I’m sorry, Stephen.’

He shakes his head. ‘I will admit it feels good to talk about this with someone. Makes it feel less like a dream I had and something that was an actual possibility. I was starting to think it was going to drive me mad, mourning for something that hasn’t happened and no one knew _could_ happen.’

‘You say you got married?’ Wong asks after a pause. Stephen cannot help the smile on his face, nor the tears that fall.

* * *

‘I still can’t believe this is happening,’ he mutters to himself as Christine straightens his tie.

‘Oh shush,’ she laughs, ‘and I am so glad Tony wouldn’t let you get married in your robes. I mean not that they don’t look smart, but this is _special_ and deserves a good suit. And boy can your man choose a good suit.’

Stephen laughs. ‘Yes he can. Is it time to head out yet?’

Christine motions for him to wait and then ducks her head out of the door and speaks to someone; her blue dress fits her perfectly and he can’t express how grateful he is to her for coming and making sure he was alright. ‘We’ve got five minutes. You want to wait out there or in here?’

‘I think perhaps in here,’ he answers, ‘then if I throw up from nerves I don’t have to go so far.’

Christine laughs. ‘How many stupidly difficult surgeries have you done in your life with not an ounce of nerves? How many death-defying battles have you been in? And _getting married_ is the thing that has you nervous enough to throw up?’

‘Oh be quiet,’ he tells her, smiling. ‘Fine, let’s go and wait with the others.’ As they walk out and along the corridor of the registry office Stephen falters mid-step. ‘Is the _whole_ team here?’

‘Even the Guardians and Captain Marvel are here,’ she nods. ‘No one was going to miss you two getting hitched.’

‘Not to add more pressure or anything,’ Stephen rolls his eyes. Fury is the first to greet him and offer his congratulations, and then he’s being passed from one person to another. It’s such a whirlwind he doesn’t even realise Tony has joined them until he comes face to face with his soon to be husband.

‘You ready, Dumbledore?’

‘As ready as I’ll ever be,’ he replies, smiling and pressing a kiss against his fiancee’s lips.

‘Hey, save it for the ceremony!’ Quill laughs. Before either of them can respond the door to the ceremony room opens and they’re all ushered through.

* * *

‘The media called it the wedding of the year,’ Stephen tells Wong, tears starting to ease now. ‘We kept it low key and only had the team there. You and Peter were our best men and witnesses, and then we all went back to the Avenger’s facility for the party. It was the best day I shall ever have, and I didn’t even get to live it properly.’

‘Stephen I’m so sorry.’

He sighs and nods. ‘I know, thank you Wong. I just…I wish that things had been different. I wish I’d had the courage to tell him his options, to _ask_ him to choose me. But I didn’t and I must now live with the consequences of my cowardice. And with knowing I sent the man I love to his death.’

‘What will you do now?’ Wong asks after a pause.

‘I shall watch over his daughter,’ he replies, voice resolute and strong once more in a way it hadn’t been since before he’d used the Time Stone on Titan. ‘From afar, I don’t feel that I deserve to be a person that is close to her all things considered. But I shall watch over her and ensure she is as safe as I can make her. I owe it to Tony.’

‘And Peter?’

‘I shall do my best for him as well. But I must respect his decision to distance himself from me and the remembered pain that I will bring him with my presence.’

After some time spent in a comfortable silence Wong finishes his tea and stands to leave. ‘You’re a braver and stronger man than I am, Stephen Strange. If you ever want to talk about what you lost come and find me.’

‘Thank you,’ he nods to his friend as Wong leaves him in peace.

After finishing his own tea he stands and clears away the dishes. When he goes to bed he turns on his side to look at the picture next to his bed, framed in a simple metallic style frame. It’s a smiling Tony, he’s not sure where the picture was taken but he’s glad he found it.

‘I love you Tony Stark,’ he tells the picture, repeating some of the words from his wedding vows. ‘I always shall, even when death has parted us. There is not a universe I would not cross to reach you.’ He blinks away tears and then sighs, closing his eyes and losing himself in memories of dancing dark eyes and lips filled with laughter, in memories of a warm body and skilled fingers. Memories of a family. ‘I wish we had our time.’

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hi everyone. I hope you enjoyed my little adventure into IronStrange. Sorry it's not as cheerful and fluff filled as my normal stuff, but you were warned. This came about because I had a thought whilst watching Infinity War again of: what if there had been a future that Stephen saw where he and Tony were together and he sent Tony on that path knowing it meant he'd never be with him? Stephen then has to mourn not only the loss of Tony, but the loss of what could have been as well. I also wonder how Peter will feel about Stephen now, knowing that he knew what was going to happen to Tony when he set them all on that path on Titan; he doesn't strike me as the kind of person who would hate anyone, but I think Peter will always have that remembered pain whenever he works with Stephen now.
> 
> Please do let me know what you think of this piece, and as always do let me know if you have any requests for any future projects. 
> 
> Love always,  
> L x


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